Slumber Party: Would you play Truth or Dare with a psychotic elf?

Did you ever have a friend growing up that all the parents loved? He/She was always a good influence and your parents never asked you where you were going if it was with that individual. Yes, I was THAT girl. Parents giving the third degree to a bunch of teenage girls going into the city on a Friday night “Where exactly are you going and what time will you… OH!! Jaime is going with you. Never mind. I’m sure you’ll stay out of trouble.”  Fast-forward a few hours later and I’m telling these same girls. “ummm… you know following those strange men we just met in a parking lot to a so called party doesn’t really seem like a good idea. Wouldn’t a burger at Friendly’s sound much better?”

I decided that Holly just needs to meet some nice friendly elves. A few calls were made and  Jolly, Jingle, Merry, Joyeux Noel, Mistletoe, and Rocky (I think her family missed the memo) trotted over in a perpetual chorus of giggles and mini sleeping bags in hand. Holly has never hosted a slumber party before so I made up an itinerary  for the night which included:

·         Hot chocolate loaded with marshmallows

·         String up popcorn and cranberry garland for the tree

·         Miracle on 34^th Street viewing

·         Bedtime reading of Good Night Moon

·         Truth or Dare ( Holly scribbled this in. I better keep an eye on that one)

The night went off without a hitch except for the tiny little meltdown when Mistletoe choose Truth and Holly made her say which family member she secretly wants to smother with a pillow while they slept. I had to intervene after tears fell and Mistletoe kept whimpering “But I LOVE everyone and never have homicidal thoughts!” Note to self.. Sleep with one eye open from now until Christmas!

I tucked in the sweet little elves and called it an evening. Sweet dreams…..

I woke up in the early hours for work and the 6 little elves were lined up in a row snoring peacefully. Too cute. As I switched on the lamp and peered a little bit closer I noticed that each elf had a letter write across her forehead with a black sharpie. L-O-S-E-R-S……..   I frantically grabbed rubbing alcohol and tried to minimize the damage to no avail but that wasn’t the only issue. Two of the faces were so heavily made up it looks like a street walker with an unsteady hand gave them a make-over using an entire Crayola box of crayons.  I haven’t seen eye shadow that blue since the 80s.

One little elf that shall remain nameless was sleeping away with her hand in a bowl of water. Does that myth still exist?  Yep, it sure does and elves are not immune. One sleeping bag in the wash and a fresh change of clothes needed.

No more sleepovers and play dates for Holly. She’s on the official banned list.

As I rushed for work and opened the freezer to grab my lean cuisine I pulled out the tiniest little frozen elf bra as well. Some pranks are still timeless after all.